Sunday, December 02, 2012

A Modest Proposal

Apologies for my recent fixation with what ails our public school system, but I believe I have solved the riddle. As I have proven in my most recent post, it is not poverty that is causing poor academic performance at Racine Unified. This should be rather obvious as RU students receive a world class education for free. So what is it?

Minorities are struggling in RU right? Is it Asians, blacks or Hispanics? Blacks and Hispanics primarily. Is it boys or girls? Both, but boys seem to be faring more poorly, with black boys doing the worst, I suspect.

Of all the students in RU, which are most likely to have their butt cracks showing? Black boys of course!

Now I don't think for a moment that exposed butt cracks cause poor academic achievement, at least not for the exposer. Rather, like poverty, there is merely a correlation. So what is the cause?

It is obvious. Black boys are competing academically with one hand tied behind their back. OK, its not actually tied behind their backs, but it is being used to keep their pants from falling down. They have one less hand to hold a pencil, use a computer, turn a page in a book, conduct a chemistry experiment etc...

They are at a huge disadvantage!

Still don't believe me? Where are the most notable successes found among the black students in RU? On the athletic fields and courts of course. They are on those occasions in uniforms that don't collect at their ankles every few minutes. The playing field is leveled and the black boys are competing just fine.

Obviously, huge academic gains could be had with one simple policy change at RU. Spandex uniforms.

1 comment:

Sean Cranley said...

I have to say, I say a young black guy at the airport once, dressed as you described, trying to hurry to catch a plane while carrying his luggage with one hand and hitching his pants up with the other. It was a rather amusing scene.